Thursday, January 15, 2009

Vicious Circle

A guy I know asked me out last night. I feel terribly bad for him. I never even considered this could happen. It never once crossed my mind… but that’s the way it goes... Why is it always the people you have no interest in whatsoever that feel JUST the opposite for you? And that the people YOU want are usually totally uninterested? Is it an endless circle? Or a long long line with one poor sap at the end with no one after him? If EVERYONE got together with who they wanted, would there be one person left with no one?

Had a funny old night last night. Also heard from one of my friends that her ex is causing all sorts of problems – she has such an idyllic relationship with her boyfriend of three years: they’re perfect together and will be fine, I’m positive... but most of all I can’t help empathising with the poor ex. He told her, 'look if you want me out of your life, say so now and I’m gone. If not, I’ll always be a part of your life.'

Tough ultimatum to cope with. Kinda kills the hope of ever being "just friends" - unless you wanna give the poor guy an excuse to keep pining... What do you do? Can exes be friends? If not why not? Why do we have to be “exes”? Why can’t we just be people? Why do we give each other that status that means we can never look at the person as JUST a person ever again? Is it such a big deal? I don’t think it should be. Unless we make it a big deal.

And another friend of mine told me their marriage broke up. Horrible thing to hear. After more than 20 years together it came to an end – at that stage you’d assume it’s ok to relax; to sit in the comfort that something like that would never happen. It just couldn’t! At least, it shouldn’t. You’re past insecurity, past the game, past everything and settled... right? But it does happen. So is there really a point? Is it stupid to have the faith in love that I do? Wavering as it may be, the faith's still there.

Life is good. But love’s pretty harsh. There’s just no winning – and it seems a lot more people are miserable than happy: Missing someone, regretting something, wanting something they can’t have. It’s not very fair, is it!


  1. ahhh i feel you, i usually get asked out by people i really have no interest in too..i feel bad, but what can i say to them right?

  2. nothing you CAN say really, is there? except try be kind.. i tried to be..

    it's nice to be nice! especially 'cos i've been in his shoes before, y'know? hell.. we're all in that position at some point or another..