Showing posts with label drawing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label drawing. Show all posts

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Eep.

I feel anxious. Since Tuesday night. Way, way, way, weh-heh-heeey too much happened Tuesday night. Still soaking it all in. Head whirring. Clearly I should never go away for a week. EVER.
I was away for too long and.. -= BAM =- ..come back to all this accumulated crazy.


Ok, that pic's a little bit of an exaggeration - I'm not pulling my hair out. Not quite. But I got carried away - and doesn't it look cool? Did it on Paint, in about 3 mins, and using a laptop touchpad?!
If I were you, I'D be impressed.... :P

Christ...

I can't believe ANY of it. Tuesday Bloody Tuesday.

Nice to see J again, axly.. Didn't see THAT one coming! What're the chances he'd walk by the very second I happened to be running up to lock the gate? Mad. Hope we both meant what we said about being friends. I didn't expect to be as happy to see him as I was. We were better as friends.

Anyway. I feel anxious.

Often when I feel anxious, I get a sick stomach.
Check.
And usually a migraine.
Check.
And I barely say two words to anyone.
Check.
And I can't decide what to wear so, distractedly, I throw on any old crap - adding to the overall air of troubled-ness.
Check.

Omg, I haven't even done my make-up properly today.
This is bullcrap. Fuck this. Snap out of it.

I'm just tired and grumpy.


Plan of action:
Shop. Neurofen Plus. Coke. Crappy Centra Sushi. Home. Shower. Sit in jamies, draw and draw and draw, and watch Breakfast at Tiffany's. Or, any DVD, really. Bitta Marilyn or Carey Grant, mebbe?

Song of the day: Pokerface.
Yes, we're all sick of it, but fuck it.


Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Look! An Art Competition!

I'm gonna enter.

I haven't entered one since I was about 11.

I'll let you know how I do.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Judge this.

No weekend plans so far. Loads of work to get done, but things are going very well! Baffled by the amount I’ve done this week. Really tired. But it’s cool. Stuff’s coming together.

Sex and the City was just on. Y’know, it’s odd – I watch it all the time, yet I really don’t like anything about it, and roll my eyes at people who say it's their fave show. Though, it's one of mine!! Silly, I know... It’s had a funny effect… and a lot of it’s crap… and what I hate is that it’s the kind of crap people buy into… It's almost like a religion for some, and otherwise-smart girls take it too seriously. Or, maybe they don't - I'm referring to people I only half-know, so, how should I know? Though, I s’pose it’s still.. entertaining… And I like the episode structure…

There was a particularly good line – are we too quick to judge judging? Talking about how being judgemental is considered a bad thing. For the most part, yes, open-mindedness all the way!! But, on the other hand… Some people are just ridiculous. Sometimes judgement is good. Reminds me of the whole PCness rampage nuisance issue… Anyway… whatever.

So there’s the update. But tonight I have the night off – and I am absolutely NOT going out, so hello! Back to my beautiful, sorely-missed blog! If I could hug you, I would. (oh, feck it, internet actions don’t have to make sense…) *hugs!!*

Tonight’s topic – my well-concealed nerdiness.

On Valentine’s day (a day which I never aknowledge but, for some reason, tends to always be memorable despite my best efforts) I spent the morning sorting through family crap (headache, headache, headache and a long story for another day and a less public forum…) And – though I wasn’t in the mood – I decided I’d go up the road where the Skycon (Skynet convention thingie) dudes were having a few brews that night. It was the last night, I’d missed all the lectures, talks, and funzies, and most of the con-goers were a little droopy-lookin after so many nights in a row on the lash… But I had a really freaking good time!

I met my hero - and I still can’t believe it. Even though I didn’t get an autograph, OR a personalised cartoon (damn you bastards who did!!), OR much time with him (damn Americans and their lack of drinking stamina – he was “tired” and had an “early flight” – he was gone within an hour of me arriving!! I know it was late, but, Boo! By the way, I was indeed as dumbstruck and retarded-acting as I knew I would be. Which sucks. ‘Cos he was DAMN cute! I think that made it even MORE nerve-wracking… When nervous around a person, I look and talk to everyone BUT them… so… not exactly the best tactic…!) – it was still cool! He was tired, but still interesting to chat to (the odd time I braved a brief word..!) Rgh. Anyway…*

But that wasn’t even the highlight of the night. Bizarre as this may sound (actually, it doesn’t really…) the highlight was chatting to my fun, semi-nerdy buddies from school who I never get to see anymore. I had no idea how much I missed that crap! Also, that tall cool English guy Jeff with his little robots – awesome and very, very interesting guy. But, my school buddies, two of whom read this so not gonna say anything (lol – freaked out? You should be :P) except that it was awesome spending time with’m… talking shite… Having a few drinks… I encountered only one un-cool person, but I don’t think they meant to come across as narrow-eyed-ly judgy and unfriendly…

Shite-talk was all it was… but the difference is, it’s fascinating shite-talk! Not yer run-of-the-mill stuff!

Like Hugh and his plans for building a working Delorean. L…M…A…O… I mean, seriously! I was enthralled! Fire-tyre-tracks, dry-ice to come out of the doors… he even thought about how best to achieve the sound effects! The only thing it WON’T do is…well… travel through time… But, as we all know, that was only ever a minor feature of the Delorean……*cough*

You don’t GET that quality of shite-talk or mad idea-throwing with non-nerds. And I’m sick of hiding my nerdish ways. We’re just a more interesting people!

There was a time where I had memorised the names of almost every single dinosaur there ever was… the era they lived in… and could draw’m fairly accurately from memory… It’s just the major ones that I can still remember, though…

I am a Pokémon master. Painstakingly trained my boys to level 100! And they. Are. Unstoppable. Come and have a go if ya think yer ‘ard enuff! (And if you can manage to find your Gameboy colour in the attic)

I used to make up my own Pokémon. Have several full copybooks of detailed designs and stats info… I submitted one to a Nintendo Mag comp. I didn’t win, some rubbish Loch Ness Monster-rip-off did and – when Gold and Silver were released, with a character that was TOO similar to my concept – I was CONVINCED they’d sent it off to Tajiri behind my back along with the other great ideas that never made it into the mag… Bastards!

((Quickly done on paint: I know they don't LOOK alike, but I SWEAR I had the idea for a water-electric Pokémon before ANYONE else. And look at the hideous shitty version they DID come up with - wouldn't my little beauty have made a much better edition to Gold and Silver?))


What else...
I was a regular in a chatroom; respected and feared by n00bs. And any chatroomers here will know how much time you gotta put in to be a known "reg". I knew all the lingo, and knew the URL by heart! I can still recite it! It's about 80characters long.

I’ve played FF7 through to the end around 10 times. But, please, who hasn’t?

Same goes with Ocarina of Time.

And the original MGS.

I LOVED Advent Children. My God. Nostalgia overload.

I was always Tails.

I LOVED the Sonic cartoons. Especially the more grown-up with the angrier theme-tune! “Soniiic… he can really move! Soniiic… he’s got an AAH-ti-tuuuude…. Soniic…. He’s the fastest thing AH-LIIIIIVE!!”

I cannot get up early. Never ever could… EXCEPT… at 7am for Power Rangers before school. Every day. (Back when it was at it's peak, that is. Lost interest when it became Super-turbo-hyper-mega-cool-awesome-wanker-asteroid-power-ninja-turtle Rangers, or whatever)

I taught myself HTML (hey, I know, it’s piss-easy as languages go, but bear in mind that, back then, there was no myspace and html was considered VERY cool)

I programmed a (shitty) clock once on a computer-summer-camp-course-thingie. Niall, what the hell was the course called?

I liked Monty Python before any of my friends. I watched it with my dad. I’d also watch Star Trek with him. He introduced me to Star Wars. My brother took a while to warm to it: but I was immediately mesmerised. He started reading the Hobbit to me when I was about 6 or 7. Maybe younger… And then progressed to the Lord of the Rings. He was so good – reading every night for hours! Such diligence too!

I remember once I fell asleep, and asked, “Could you go back to that bit with ((whatever it was))..? Sorry, but that’s the last thing I remember.”
Dad: “…That was 3 chapters ago.”

But he read it again! We used to argue too. And there’s one argument we’ve never finished – to this day – about the possibility of time-travel (NOT getting into it today…) I miss those arguments.

I guess he could be blamed for my nerdiness. Along with my green eyes. You rock dad!! (Though, could’ve done without the rubbish eyesight… they’re pretty, but don’t work good!)

Anyway; judging judgement. I judge people who judge people. I am judged, every day, for having bottle-blonde hair, and acting like a ditz, and various other reasons. I'm sick of the surprise on peoples' faces when it dawns on them that, yes, there IS something going on in my pretty little head. But I like it too. It gives me a smug sort of satisfaction. When a person makes an assumption about me, or are condescending towards me, I smile to myself and think about how much smarter than them I clearly am, and how much of a dense moron they must be.

Ha. Lousy!

*in-post promos of other posts by me are bad enough, but two of the same one? Sorry. I'm not a complete whore - I just like the wikipedia-clicky-word feeling it gives to posts (and it saves me re-explaining stuff I'm referring to)

Monday, January 26, 2009

Re: Ouch >.<


Isn't it incredible? It's migraine art! I, personally, don't get a visual aura - but stuff like this makes me wish I did! (Instead I just act out of character, stressed, and spaced-out during the pre-attack aura stage..... or sometimes I can get hyper-happy or startlingly low! Which is weird, and I don't know what's going on till the pain hits and I'm like - Oh! Right!)

A few months back I read in Scientific American (my dad subscribes - he's awesome) that - apparently - the migraine "happens" in the front of the brain in people who get visual disturbances, and in people who don't see anything funny it's in the back.
(Sorry I haven't a proper quote or anything - I've lost the issue somewhere in my room!)

Mad jagged designs, blind spots... it all sounds much more interesting than mood swings and concentration lapses! But, yeah, i know; greener grass and all that jazz...

Here's another from this thread (which is worth checking out..):




I totally fucking know how that^^ feels! That, right there, is similar to stuff I've doodled when I've had a headache (and a pen handy..eg: in work/college) - might post some here at some point! But I have a rotten habit of throwing away everything I draw these days...
(something to do with my bitterness at having abandoned the art college dream?)

Have a look at this NY Times slideshow for more examples!

"... there is speculation that some of the mystical paintings from medieval times, including the work of Hildegard von Bingen (Saint Hildegard), were actually the "visions" that resulted, at least in part, from a migraine attack. Van Gogh, Seurat, and many other artists have also been cited as possible "migraine artists." "

^That article from Psychology Today is an interesting read if you've got 5 minutes.. it's true that it's very difficult to describe pain in words sometimes - and I don't know how many times I've felt like slapping a doctor who's dismissed my headache as a sinus congestion-related pain when I'm trying to explain that "it's not just there, it's aaall here and kind of, in that way and pushing down here and sometimes here and... but further in.. and that way and through there!"

ha... clear?
Crystal!